Maria Toso, The Heal What Hurts Process

Ages ago, a teacher told me that we have little spirit guides around us called “runners.” They’re always nearby, eager to help with the little things of daily life, especially finding those darn things that mysteriously disappear.

I taught my kids to ask the runners for help when they were little, and they both swear by it to this day. I even had a friend in Como Park who didn’t believe in anything supernatural tell me, “I don’t believe in any of this stuff, but I have to admit, the runners work.”

The trick is, you can’t be tight and frantic when you ask. You ask for help, then let go. Stop obsessively looking, loosen up, and somehow the thing tends to appear when you least expect it.

Which brings me to my favorite glasses. They’re perfect for traveling because they transition into sunglasses, and right before leaving for Ireland, they completely disappeared. I searched my car, bags, purses, pockets, everywhere. Nothing.

Finally I said, “Runners, when you see them, please show me where they are. I really want to take them to Ireland.” And I stopped looking.

TODAY, the day before I leave, I went to Mississippi Market for candied ginger and discovered their Concord grapes. Oh my God. Absolutely divine.

I got back into my car, pulled out a cluster, and one little grape escaped and disappeared under my seat. I reached down to find it, felt around, found the grape…and then my hand touched something else.

MY GLASSES.

Completely unscathed, sitting under my seat the entire time.

So thank you once again, runners. Apparently you knew exactly where they were. You just needed to wait for the right moment and enlist the help of a runaway Concord grape. 😂🍇

(Better than a wasp sting, but that’s another story.)

Ireland, here I come, favorite glasses and all. 🇮🇪

1. You can’t change another person. Like, ever.
2. You can change yourself, with love. Loving Presence, right there where it hurts.
3. Sit in body scan meditation. Every. Single. Day.
4. Enjoy every second with your kids. Time really does fly, just like old people always say.
5. Discipline is good.
6. So is wasting time doing absolutely nothing.
7. Speak love over your body. All the time.
8. It’s okay if you no longer feel European but don’t quite feel American either.
9. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. The first time.
10. You’re going to need more and more alone time. And that’s okay.

Even yogis get triggered.

We may know how to breathe through a difficult asana, quiet the mind in meditation, and talk beautifully about presence and equanimity. But what happens when someone says the one thing that gets under our skin? When an old relationship pattern gets activated and suddenly we’re reacting from a much smaller version of ourselves?

An emotional trigger isn’t just a thought. We experience it in the body as contraction, a place where breath, prana, and our natural loving presence no longer seem to flow freely.

When that contraction is activated, we tend to go out: we lash out, numb out, or check out.

Heal What Hurts offers another possibility: go in.

Join author and longtime yoga teacher Maria Toso for an experiential two-hour workshop based on her book Heal What Hurts, published by Llewellyn Worldwide.

Through yoga, breath, meditation, and somatic awareness, we’ll explore where emotional pain actually lives in the body and practice meeting those contracted places with loving presence rather than resistance.

In yogic language, we might understand this loving presence as Purusha, the deeper Self that can witness what is happening without becoming completely identified with it.

As the contraction softens, something beautiful becomes possible: we can respond from that deeper Self instead of automatically reenacting an old pattern.

Come with a real trigger from your own life. Leave with practices you can use when life, relationships, and yes, even your fellow yogis, inevitably push your buttons.

Yoga beyond the poses.
From emotional trigger to loving presence.

Saturday, August 29 | 3–5 PM
Temple Bar Yoga, Dublin art

1. You can’t change another person. Like, ever.
2. You can change yourself, with love. Loving Presence, right there where it hurts.
3. Sit in body scan meditation. Every. Single. Day.
4. Enjoy every second with your kids. Time really does fly, just like old people always say.
5. Discipline is good.
6. So is wasting time doing absolutely nothing.
7. Speak love over your body. All the time.
8. It’s okay if you no longer feel European but don’t quite feel American either.
9. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. The first time.
10. You’re going to need more and more alone time. And that’s okay.

We carry so much tension without even realizing it.

In the jaw.
The chest.
The belly.
The stories we keep replaying.

But when we stop fighting what we feel and meet that contraction with loving presence, something begins to soften.

We become less reactive.
More compassionate.
More honest.
More free.

Healing ourselves changes how we meet everyone around us.

Loving presence heals.

We pay attention when our bodies aren’t digesting food well. We feel the discomfort and know something isn’t moving through us.

Our emotions need to be metabolized too.

When something hurts, we often rush to react, fix, explain, suppress or move on. But the emotional experience can remain as a contraction in the body, waiting to be met.

Healing happens when we slow down and bring loving presence directly to that contraction. Not trying to get rid of it. Not analyzing it. Simply allowing ourselves to feel what is there and giving it the loving attention it needs.

As the contraction is felt and metabolized, it can begin to soften, move and release.

What we don’t metabolize emotionally, we carry in the body.

And what we meet with loving presence can transform. Loving presence heals.

What we don’t metabolize emotionally, we carry in the body.

When something hurts, the experience can remain as a contraction in the body, waiting to be met.

When we slow down and bring loving presence to that contraction, it can begin to soften, move and release.

We don’t need to fix every feeling. Sometimes we simply need to stay present long enough to digest it. Loving presence heals.