FACT

Since it’s Sunday, I want to talk theology for a moment.

For those of you who don’t appreciate the God-talk here, no worries, feel free to scroll on by. But for those who are interested in engaging this subject through a theological lens, read on.

This is, after all, one of my areas of study and expertise, and there’s something I believe is important to clarify.

Christians sometimes say things to adoptees like:

“God planned your adoption.”

“God knew exactly what family you needed.”

“God meant for you to be adopted.”

“Everything happened exactly the way God intended.”

These statements are usually offered with good intentions.

But good intentions do not automatically make something good theology.

Christian theology gives us much richer categories for understanding what happens in a broken world...divine sovereignty, providence, free will/human agency, sin, suffering, injustice, lament and redemption, to name a few. We should not collapse all of those categories into the simplistic declaration of, “God planned it.”

There are significant theological differences between what God causes, permits, and redeems. Providence and direct causation are not synonymous.

To affirm that God is sovereign over an adoptee’s life does not require us to conclude that God directly caused every circumstance within that life. And that distinction matters tremendously when we talk about adoption. Because before an adoption can occur, something else has already occurred. A child has become separated from their family of origin. The circumstances surrounding that separation vary enormously.

There may have been poverty, addiction, abuse, death, family dysfunction, social stigmas, lack of resources, coercion, institutional decisions, human choices, injustice, or circumstances we may never know.

So when we confidently tell an adoptee, “God planned your adoption,” we need to stop and consider everything we may inadvertently be attributing directly to the will of God.

But think carefully about what that would mean. Are we really prepared to say that God desired the circumstances that led to the separation in the first place....that every human choice along the way was divinely orchestrated, and even the failures, injustices, or brokenness surrounding a child’s relinquishment somehow reflected His intention?

Those are significant theological claims.

Divine sovereignty does not require us to attribute every human decision, loss, injustice, or tragedy directly to God's causative will.

Christians should be capable of holding something more nuanced.

We can believe God was present, remained sovereign and may have worked providentially within circumstances He did not necessarily initiate. We can believe God brought people, relationships, healing, purpose, and goodness into an adoptee's life. And we can absolutely believe in redemption.

But here's the distinction I wish we understood better. Redemption is not retroactive endorsement. The fact that God can redeem something does not mean we must declare everything that preceded that redemption good. Or even everything that proceeded after that adoption good, either.

Keep in mind that the very concept of redemption assumes there is something in need of redeeming. Christians believe God specializes in entering broken places and bringing something beautiful of it. But we don't normally conclude that because God redeemed a painful situation, He must therefore have desired every painful event that produced it.

For instance, suppose a husband is unfaithful to his wife and ultimately leaves the marriage. Years later, she meets a wonderful man, falls in love, and builds a beautiful life with him. We might wholeheartedly believe that God brought healing, redemption, and unexpected goodness into her life...but would we therefore conclude that her first husband’s betrayal was God’s will? Certainly not. We understand that God’s ability to redeem what happened does not mean He desired or ordained the wrongdoing that preceded it. So why would we abandon that same theological distinction when we talk about adoption?

“God worked through it” and “God wanted it to happen exactly this way” are two different theological claims. We need to stop treating them as interchangeable.

And I want to add something else because this frequently happens in Christian conversations about adoption...infant adoption and our spiritual adoption through Christ are not the same thing. AT ALL. Scripture's theological language of adoption speaks to our relationship with God and our inclusion in His family through Christ.

Infant adoption is a human experience involving an actual child, an original family, separation, legal processes, human decisions, and the formation of another family.

Using spiritual adoption to romanticize the complexities of infant adoption does neither theology nor adoptees any favors. We can affirm the biblical doctrine of spiritual adoption (salvation) wholeheartedly without requiring an adoptee to interpret their own relinquishment as a divine object lesson.

So perhaps instead of telling an adoptee what God intended, we could become comfortable saying:

“I don't know why every part of your story happened. But I believe God can redeem what has been painful.”

That doesn't diminish God's sovereignty.

At all.

I believe it takes God's sovereignty seriously enough that we don't have to oversimplify it.

If you grew up in Christian spaces, what theological explanations were you given for your adoption? Did those explanations help you, or did you eventually have to rethink them?

This scripture hit me hard this morning. 2 things can be true at the same time. A situation that bring grief for one maybe joy for another. We can both take those to God, in our mourning and celebrating.

“But many of the older priests, Levites, and family leaders, who could remember seeing the first Temple, began to cry aloud. They cried while the others there shouted for joy. The sound could be heard far away. All of them made so much noise that no one could tell the difference between the shouts of joy and the crying.”
‭‭Ezra‬ ‭3‬:‭12‬-‭13‬ ‭ERV‬‬

Bible - Bible App Encouraging and challenging you to seek intimacy with God every day.

Back to school is an exciting time for most kids, but especially for children like Abel who love to learn! 12 year old Abel is a little boy who has a passion for music, and is currently in foster care waiting for adoption. To learn more about how you can open your home to care for children like Abel, consider attending this upcoming FREE informational meeting taking place at Richland College on Saturday, August 22.

More info & registration:
http://embracetexas.app.neoncrm.com/nx/portal/event-detail?event=464&