Saber Coaching

At the VP level, people look to you to break ties and make the strategic calls.

But today's challenges are nuanced, and sometimes it helps to slow the game down and consider if two things can be right.

I asked two co-leaders, how might you move forward assuming you're both right?

Don't find a watered-down compromise; let the strategy bring out the best of both.

The next time you catch yourself thinking either/or, what would change if you held both? Share your thoughts in the comments below 👇

For a lot of guys, who you are is what you do, at least in the earning years.

But as work fades as a focus, many of us land in what they call the friendship recession.

The share of men with at least six close friends fell from 55% in 1990 to 27% in 2021.

Only 20% of men get their emotional support from friends, and that load often shifts to spouses.

When was the last time you called a friend just to say you needed them? Share your thoughts in the comments below 👇

You hit every goal you set, so why does it feel like something's missing?

You reached the summit you spent a decade climbing, the title, the income, the life you planned on paper, and then the momentum quietly stalled.

It isn't burnout; it's more of a low hum of restlessness where nothing is wrong, but nothing is pulling you forward either.

Here's the reframe: stuck isn't failure; it's information and the sign you've outgrown the goals that got you here.

Stop optimizing a game you've already won, ask what you actually want next, and measure success from the inside.

If you feel successful and stuck at the same time, book a conversation and let's map the next chapter, one that actually feels like yours.

The hardest part about senior leadership is fighting the urge to pick a side.

When you get to that VP level, lots of people look to you for the answers, to break ties and make the strategic decisions.

But with so much uncertainty around us, sometimes it helps to slow the game down and consider if two things can be right.

Years ago, we could gather information from a few trusted people, make the old pro-con list, figure out which side is stronger, and off we go.

But today's challenges are nuanced.

They require speed and careful consideration.

They require a strategic long view and an executable short-term plan.

I was working with two co-leaders who shared responsibility for their department.

One felt they needed to push forward fast with AI as a core part of their strategy.

The other was convinced that building leadership skills in the next level was the most important next step.

Back and forth they went, like watching tennis.

So I asked, how might you move forward assuming you're both right?

Don't find a watered-down compromise.

Let the strategy bring out the best of both.

They relaxed, asked okay, how, and then we started the real work of paradoxical thinking.

The next time you catch yourself stuck in either/or, what would change if you assumed both sides were right? Share your thoughts in the comments below 👇

When I ask most teams how they make decisions, I get a room full of blank stares.

Half look to the formal leader.

The leader glances around as if to say everyone participates, right?

And a few just look down.

But nobody really answers.

That silence is the problem, because two quiet styles usually fill it, and neither is a real decision.

The first is plop.

Someone offers a suggestion, the room goes cold and quiet, and the idea just drops.

The second is minority rules.

Someone floats an idea, the leader says great idea, and it moves forward regardless of how everyone else felt.

The fix isn't more meetings; it's answering three questions on purpose and out loud:
1️⃣ What are the decisions we make as a team?
2️⃣ What process will we use to make them?
3️⃣ How will we evaluate them so we can learn?

Answer those three, and output improves almost immediately.

Which of these three would change the most for your team right now?
Share your thoughts in the comments below 👇

A phone full of contacts means nothing if there's no one to call at your lowest point.

For a lot of guys, who you are is what you do, at least in the earning years.

But as work starts to feel like less of a focus, we look around and find ourselves in the middle of what they call the friendship recession.

The numbers tell the story.

The share of men with at least six close friends fell from 55% in 1990 to 27% in 2021.

That's a drop of nearly half in just three decades.

And I know some of you are thinking, I'm supposed to have six?

Here's how it happens.

The quarterly meetup with a couple of friends to talk about goals falls away.

The running group fades.

The brewery closes.

Then pickleball, and too many injuries.

We all have our ups and downs, but only 1 in 5 men get their emotional support from their friends.

That leaves a lot of emotional weight to fall on spouses.

None of this is about having a bigger contact list.

It's about having someone to call when you say, I need you.

That kind of connection doesn't rebuild itself, but it does rebuild when we're intentional about it, and that's a lot of what happens when we get out on the trail together.

When did a friendship in your life quietly fall away, and what would it take to pick the phone back up? Share your thoughts in the comments below 👇

Your brain is like a runner constantly in motion, only forced to shut off at night.

But there's space between overwork and idle.

It's called ease, and we find it through awe.

Awe makes us feel small in a good way, and that's where clarity lives.