Integro

What did you get up to last Saturday?

At Wellington Central Library, I got together with a group of interesting people for Think Well Corner Session 3 – “Why we procrastinate – and what to do about it.” We had a highly engaged group of people from teenagers and students to doctors and managers.

What many people don’t realise about procrastination is that it is more an emotion-regulation problem than a time-management or laziness one. Researchers call it, “short-term mood repair”. The workshop focused on understanding that and how we practically get around something your brain likes to do!

A big thanks to an amazing group of engaged people for not procrastinating and actually pitching up on Saturday. Well done everyone!

One of our fabulous attendees Sarah had this to say about the session:

“Thank you very much for the wonderful workshop with practical tips… I am glad I stayed back a little longer to chat, and I am truly inspired by your strength and kindness to share your gift of knowledge. Looking forward to the next sessions.”

Our next workshop is on Saturday 26 September, same time and place, 11am-12pm Wellington Central Library Hui 4 Level 1. The topic is: “Self-confidence – why we lose it and how to get it back”.

Would love to see you there. To book your place - [email protected] or 021 2563658

Thanks to my good mate Robert Nelson for the great pics. You rock!

Monday reflection

As you begin the week and create a "To Do List" of important tasks, be mindful of the fact that procrastination is less a time management problem than an emotion management problem.

Research shows we put certain things off because thinking about them creates uncomfortable feelings and not generally because we're lazy. (Although this may be true of some people)

Getting more organised therefore won't solve the problem of delayed action. But addressing the underlying emotions they bring up will help you understand why you aren't getting going.

What task are you hoping to get done this week?

The story you tell yourself

Hi everyone

If you'd like an idea of the type of conversations we have at our Think Well Corner workshops, you can read all about it in our August newsletter.

On the 11 July, we launched Think Well Corner here in Wellington - and as promised I’ve shared interesting titbits in the newsletter from the inaugural session, which was titled: "The story you tell yourself."

The reason I chose this topic for our first workshop is because the stories we carry about ourselves are often far more influential than we realise. Sometimes they help us move forward. Sometimes they hold us back. Either way, they deserve a closer look.

The August newsletter is packed with great content, helpful tips, reflections, and a super video on the topic by Dean Graziosi. It's not as good as being at the workshop in person but it's close!

Why don't you have a read, and if you feel like it, share your thoughts on the limiting stories you've closed the book on?

Take care and I wish you good thinking

Janine x

The story you tell yourself What is your story? Do you have a narrative that runs in the background as you go about your life, influencing what you do and what you believe you are capable of? The interesting thing is that we all do, even if we are not aware of it. I wonder how your story goes. In July we launched Think Well Co...

Monday reflection

Most of what we worry about today will be forgotten in a year. There isn't much that warrants fretting about. Think about something in the past that seemed important at the time that you don't even recall today. It provides real perspective about what matters.

Sunday musings

As the Wellington weather was ferocious this morning, I worked out on the lounge floor with the heat pumps on 20 degrees because it was 6 degrees outside! 🥶 (Felt like 0 my weather app told me)

While doing various exercises on my workout mat, I stared at the decorative ceiling panels, which were one of the main reasons I wanted to live in this house. 💙

As I'm prone to musings on these kinds of things, I thought about the master artisan who crafted these beautiful, ornate ceilings, the attention to detail, the work ethic and pride shown.

How many years ago was this gorgeous ceiling created, bridging that time and this, so someone like me can marvel at it while doing 20 crunches. 🌿

Life fascinates me endlessly. 🌍

Don't bring yourself down

If you're going through a tough time, try and resist the urge to feel sorry for yourself.

It's human to feel deflated if life is cranking up the hard stuff but you can't let yourself wallow... well, not for too long!

Acknowledge that the situation sucks, then roll up your sleeves and get to work coming up with a way out of it.

It might not work straight away but you'll feel better for being proactive and attempting different solutions.

If at first you don't succeed, try try try again. (W.H. Hickson)

What confidence actually is

I ran a recent poll on X that showed "Growing self-confidence" as the most popular topic. I promised a range of posts on the top topic, so let's start with something that seems obvious but isn't.

What is self-confidence? It's not self-esteem or arrogance or just feeling good about yourself. It's not extraversion or being able to talk well in public.

Self-confidence is the earned, realistic trust that you can handle what happens, not certainty that you'll succeed, but faith in your ability to cope, adapt, and keep going even if you don't.

If you want to rebuild your confidence, you need to rebuild trust in yourself.

Monday mindset - small steps, steady growth

Hi everyone

When I was recovering from my illness last year, I learned that progress isn't about speed, it's about direction. Some days walking a few times up and down the driveway at home was enough. Other days, I was flat on my back binge-watching episodes of some TV show or other.

It's easy to become frustrated when you feel you aren't moving towards your goals fast enough but consistency beats intensity over the long term. Focusing on one point in time doesn't give you a true picture, zoom out and see the overall landscape.

Try not to be disheartened by setbacks, they will happen. Learn some useful information from them and then move on. Don't berate yourself, you're human and you're doing your best.

Even though progress goes up and down, which I discovered throughout my recuperation - as long as you improve steadily, you will get there in the end.

Take care and I wish you good thinking this week.

Janine x

Stop waiting to feel ready. You won't.

One of the questions I get asked a lot in my coaching practice is how to become more self-confident. And the answer seems counterintuitive.

It feels like you need to try and increase your confidence first, then you'll feel ready to try bold things... but it's actually the other way round.

The single most evidence-backed way to build self-confidence is taking action and accumulating small wins.

Confidence doesn't come from thinking positively about yourself, although that does help! It comes from doing things and seeing that you can handle them.

Each time you try something, succeed (or even just survive failure 😎), your brain updates its belief in your capability. The story you tell yourself shifts.

The cycle looks like: set a small, achievable challenge → do it → feel the proof → raise the bar slightly → repeat.

Over time, that track record becomes evidence that you can trust yourself. And the more you trust yourself, the stronger your self-confidence.

Other things such as affirmations, mindset work, appearance, all definitely help, but nothing replaces the real-life experience of showing up and doing the thing.