Coaching by Carolina

That launch didn't go the way you planned.
The client didn't renew, or the proposal came back with a no.

Within seconds, you know which story you defaulted to.
➜ "I'm not good at this."
➜ "People like me don't get to this level."
➜ "I always do this wrong."

The story builds fast, and it feels completely factual.
This is the part worth paying attention to: not the outcome itself,
but the meaning you attached to it before you finished processing what happened.

Mary Tyler Moore said:
𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞 if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.

She was right. And bravery isn't the ability
to ignore the story your brain writes in that moment.

It's the ability to ask where that 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 in the first place.
Because the script you reach for when things go wrong is rarely new.

It's usually the same one you've been running for most of your life,
and it started before this business, before this client, before today.

The outcome is data. The verdict is the old story.
Learning to 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 changes everything.

What does the voice in your head say the moment an outcome in your work doesn't land?

August 19 is World Photography Day. And if you're anything like most of my clients, you already know exactly which photo of yourself you'd delete first.

Here's your exercise this month.

𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩 𝟏: 𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨.

Not a filtered one. Not the tenth take. Stand up, shoulders back, chin up, and let someone take one photo of you today, exactly as you are. No hiding behind the camera today.

𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩 𝟐: 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭.

Open your favourite AI, upload the photo, and pick one of these two, whichever you like more:

💃 *𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘦:*

"Turn me into a superheroine version of myself. Give me a cape, a dramatic pose, a stunning and dramatic backdrop, with powers I clearly haven't told anyone about yet. Make it completely over the top."

*🪭𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘰𝘯𝘦:*

“Show me as the woman who already runs the next level of the business I have: deeply confident, elegant, abundant, warm, powerful and completely at ease, with my real face, refined makeup and lightly styled hair, elegant jewellery and a designer dress.”

𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩 𝟑: 𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐭.

Now post it. 𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐦𝐞 if you post it. I'd love to see who showed up.

Looking forward to seeing your creations!!

Excuses are not a character flaw.
They are just very good at their job.

You learned to make them before you had a word for it.
When you were small, and wanting more than you were getting and hurt more than you could manage.

A part of you found a way to make not-getting-it feel okay
and the excuse became the protection that keeps working.

Now it shows up as:
➜ I'll raise my prices when the market stabilizes.
➜ I'll put myself out there when I have a proper website.
➜ I'll take that client when I feel more confident.

Each one feels completely 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 from the inside.
But each one keeps you exactly where you are.

What helps is seeing the story running 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐞.
The story that this isn't safe and that this isn't for you.
None of it serves you but you are treating it as the truth.

What would you do this week if the excuses stopped feeling reasonable?

You hit every goal you set. And you add the next level
before the first one is even fully achieved.

You tell yourself you work best under pressure,
and technically that's true.
You perform well under pressure.

And it's not your productivity or results that suffer, those look fine.
What's suffering is you.

Driven women find a way around every obstacle,
add more to the to-do list,
take a bit more responsibility,
and override the 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐱𝐡𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 at the same time.

Because overriding signals is how you got here.
On the “higher up”.

That wiring is real and it's part of how you're built.
But the same 𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘺 that makes you brilliant in a challenge,
also makes you very good at staying in toxic situations.

There's a difference
between being pushed by a 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠
and being pushed by the fear of stopping.

When was the last time
you 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 because it felt right,
not just because you could handle it?

You opened the pricing page to update your rates.
You typed in the new number, looked at it for a moment, and changed it back.

Not because you didn’t think about it beforehand.
Ha! You thought about it until your brain went numb.
You’ve been thinking about this for a loooong time. Too long.

And just now, you again told yourself
you weren't ready yet.

That's your rope.
The elephant doesn't stay because the chain is strong.
She stays because she doesn’t know any better.

Just like you… she was programmed.
To believe she is smaller than she is.

You didn't choose this.
It comes from watching the women in your family
stay exactly where they were. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥.

It comes from learning young,
that wanting more was selfish,
that standing out was “bossy”,
that good girls smile and stay silent.

And that programming is still running.
As hesitation before you 𝐪𝐮𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐞,
as the urge to add more to earn it,
and as the thought that you're not quite established enough yet.

Your rope isn't made of logic.

It runs through the family,
and that's where it needs to be 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥.

Where in your business are you 𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞 you never agreed to?