Make Me Unbreakable

Hey,

Hope you’ve had a good weekend.

Did you do something fun?… or did you do the same as you do every other weekend and put everyone else first which left you on the sofa last night feeling like WTF?

Anyway….I built Unbreakable ten years ago.

And it flat out worked.

You probably remember.

Women transformed.

Lost weight.

Got stronger.

Smiled more….

And changed their lives.

But here's what I've realised:

That was ten years ago.

And you're not the same person anymore.

Think about it.

Ten years ago, you were different.

Not worse. Not better.

Just... different.

Your body was different.

Your energy levels were different.

Your life was different.

Your priorities were different.

Maybe you didn't have kids yet.

Maybe work wasn't as demanding.

Maybe you had more time to think about meal plans and workouts.

Maybe you could be perfect with your nutrition.

Maybe you could go to the gym 5 days a week without feeling guilty about something else you weren't doing.

Maybe you had the mental space for it.

But that was then.

And here's what's happened since:

You've lived a decade.

You've learned things.

Real things.

Things that only come from actually living.

You've learned what actually works for your life.

You've learned what doesn't.

You've probably tried things that looked good on paper but fell apart in reality.

You've probably quit things that promised everything but asked too much.

You've learned the hard way.

And that's worth something.

That wisdom is worth everything.

And because of everything you have learned you have what is probably going to be a once in a life time opportunity.

You get to design your own program.

So I'm asking you to help me.

Over the next 5 days, I'm going to ask you some real questions.

Simple ones.

The kind only you can answer.

Because I can't guess what you need now.

Only you know that.

And if I'm going to rebuild this programme, I need to hear from the people who've actually lived the last ten years.

Who know what works and what doesn't.

Who know their own bodies and lives.

Because in 14 days from today the open list for The Unbreakable50 will launch.

So here’s my first question.

If you could design the perfect programme for your actual life right now…what's the ONE thing it absolutely has to do?

Don't overthink it.

And then secondary, which is just as important:

What's the ONE thing it absolutely must not do?

Because I'm guessing you've learned some things over the last ten years.

You've probably realised that some programmes ask too much.

Some don't understand your reality.

Some make you feel guilty when life gets messy.

Some expect perfection when perfection isn't possible.

You know what doesn't work for you.

So tell me.

What's off the table?

What would make you walk away before you even started?

Hit reply.

Tell me both. I reply to all of my emails.

Here’s your once chance to design your own program.

So have your say on exactly what it is that you think you need at this stage of your life to stop starting.

Lynton “have your say” Dell

Morning girls,

Happy Friday…..

I want to talk about a very specific moment.

You're out with friends.

Maybe it's a family birthday.

Or maybe it’s lunch with the girls….

Someone takes a photo of the group.

You're laughing.

You're having a good time.

Then you see the photo.

Your heart sinks.

You don't recognise the woman looking back at you.

You notice the double chin.

The way your "safe" black top clings to your stomach.

The way you positioned yourself behind someone else so only your face was really visible.

And almost immediately:

Oh my god. Delete that pls. I look awful.

Then you probably tell yourself:

I'm just not photogenic.

But maybe that's not actually the problem.

Maybe you haven't become un-photogenic.

Maybe you've become invisible to yourself.

And I think that's something a lot of women don't realise is happening.

You spend your week being the fixer.

You're the one who remembers everything.

The kids.

The work.

The appointments.

The shopping.

The birthdays.

The meals.

Everyone else's problems.

You're 100% reliable for everyone else...

But somewhere along the way, you've stopped being reliable for yourself.

Then the weekend comes.

The kids are up early.

There's cleaning to do.

Food to sort.

Things to organise.

There’s no school.

And before you know it, you've spent another weekend looking after everyone else while telling yourself you'll get around to you later.

Then Monday comes around.

You open the wardrobe.

Nothing feels right.

You try one thing.

Then another.

You don't like how anything looks.

So you grab the safe option.

Something dark.

Something loose.

Something you can disappear into.

And you're exhausted before the day has even started.

And it isn't just the clothes.

Maybe you've stopped saying yes to photos.

Maybe you've stopped going out as much.

Maybe you've avoided buying new clothes because you're telling yourself you'll do it when you've lost some weight.

Maybe you've stopped doing things you used to enjoy because you just don't feel the same anymore…

And slowly...

Without even really noticing...

Your life starts getting smaller.

Not because you don't want to live it.

Because you're waiting to feel different before you allow yourself to.

And that's the bit I want you to think about.

What happens if you keep waiting?

Another year goes by.

Another five years.

Another ten.

How many more photos get deleted?

How many more nights out get turned down?

How many more outfits stay in the wardrobe because you're waiting until you feel "good enough" to wear them?

And how much of your life are you willing to postpone until you finally feel happy with yourself?

Because this isn't really about losing a few pounds.

It's about the perfectionism spiral.

You tell yourself:

"I'll start when I can do it properly."

Then you start.

You try to do everything perfectly.

You miss something.

You feel like you've failed.

So you stop.

Then you feel worse.

Then you promise yourself you'll start again Monday.

And the whole thing starts over.

That's exhausting.

So here's what I want you to do this weekend.

Don't wait until you feel confident.

Don't wait until you've lost weight.

Don't wait until you have something better to wear.

Do one thing you've been avoiding.

Say yes to the photo.

Go for the coffee.

Put on the outfit you've been saving.

Go out with your friends.

Take the kids somewhere.

Whatever you've been telling yourself you'll do when you feel better...

do a small version of it now.

And shall I tell you the hard truth.

No one cares what you look like.

Everyone is struggling in their own little world, with their own problems to worry about what dress you have on…

Or that you’ve gained a few pounds…..

Because getting yourself back doesn't start when you finally look different.

It starts when you stop waiting for permission to live your life.

It's you grabbing the first thing out of the wardrobe without spending an hour worrying about how you look.

It's you taking a photo and not immediately asking someone to delete it.

It's you saying yes to your friends instead of scrolling past their messages.

It's you letting yourself enjoy your life before you've achieved the perfect version of yourself.

Because that woman you're waiting to become?

She's not waiting at the end of your weight loss journey.

She's already there.

You've just spent a long time putting her last.

Go find her this weekend.

Have fun.

I’ll see you next week.

Lynton “Give yourself some you time again” Dell

Hey,

I got roped into going to the cinema the other day.

My niece needed someone to pay for her, so apparently that meant I was nominated. 😂

Anyway, we went to see this new film called Obsession.

I won't spoil it for you.

But basically, there's a woman who isn't particularly attracted to this guy...

…and then, all of a sudden, she becomes completely obsessed with him.

Totally obsessed.

And, as usual, it got me thinking.

Because I see exactly the same thing happen with women all the time.

I see it in the gym constantly.

A woman hasn't been training.

She hasn't been going to the gym.

She hasn't been drinking enough water.

She hasn't really been taking care of herself at all.

And then suddenly...

She's found a programme.

And this time, she thinks:

"This is it."

"This is the one that's finally going to change everything."

So she goes all in.

She goes from zero to hero.

No nutrition → trying to stick to a plan 100%.

No training → training 5 or 6 days a week.

Barely drinking water → trying to hammer 3 litres a day.

Everything changes overnight.

And could you guess what I see 90% of the time within 3 or 4 weeks?

Yep.

They've bailed.

They've quit.

They've given up.

But why?

I'll tell you why.

They went from zero to hero.

They didn't take into account one very important thing...

And it’s what I keep telling you.

Life is going to come at them.

The kids get ill.

Work gets stressful.

Something happens at home.

They miss a workout.

They eat something that wasn't on the plan.

They don't drink their 3 litres of water.

And suddenly...

Their brain tells them they've ruined everything.

So they give up.

But the problem was never the plan.

It was trying to do everything at 100mph from day one.

And I'm pretty much certain you've experienced this at some point.

You've had that moment where you've decided I’ve had enough right?

That's it.

I can’t take it no more.

I'm changing everything.

You go absolutely all in.

And then life happens.

And suddenly you're back where you started.

That's exactly why we do things differently at Unbreakable.

We slow everything down.

We don't dump food, training, coaching, tracking and everything else on you in week one.

We take it right back to basics.

Most programmes:

Day 1 → EVERYTHING → burnout → quit.

Unbreakable:

Week 1 → Foundations and learning our system

Week 2 → Nutrition talk and the best way to work it

Weeks 3–4 → Start putting week 1 & 2 together and build consistency

Week 4+ → Bigger Goals

In week one, all we're really doing is getting you onto our platform and helping you understand why and how we do what we do.

Long before we even start talking about nutrition.

By the end of week two, we start bringing nutrition in.

And then?

We actually leave you alone for another couple of weeks.

Not because we don't care.

Because we want you to build some momentum.

Build some consistency.

Build some experience of what happens when real life gets in the way.

Because it will.

And we want you to learn how to deal with that before we start asking you to make the bigger changes.

Then, around week four, that's when the real work starts.

That's when we start looking at your actual goals.

What do you want to achieve?

What's actually getting in your way?

What are the things in your life that need to change?

And then we work on those things together.

Not week one.

Not week two.

Week four.

Because by then, you've had a month to understand the system, build some consistency and learn what it actually feels like to live this way.

I wish more women would understand this.

You have to slow down now, to speed up later.

They speed everything up in week one...only to slow everything down by week four because it all became too hard.

And here's something else I want you to understand.

You don't have to be perfect.

We don't want you to be perfect 100% of the time.

We actually suggest 80% of the time.

80% on plan.

20% enjoying your life.

Because that's what real life looks like.

And that's how you get results.

Results that actually stick.

Lynton “slow it down, to speed it up” Dell

P.S. If this post helped and you want to see more of them direct in your email inbox so you don't miss out, sign up for my almost daily free emails here

Email Opt In Stop Searching for Willpower You Don’t Have.The fitness industry told you that you just needed more willpower. They were wrong. The reason you've struggled isn't because you don't know what to do.It's because nobody showed you how to handle everything that happens before the food choices, the wo...

Morning…

Let me tell you about Charlotte…

She was actually one of my favourite clients because she told me this story I’m about to share.

And then after she asked me for a hug.

I remember it like it was yesterday.

You see I don’t do face to face consultations anymore.

They’re just not for me.

But Charlotte asked to speak with me face to face before she signed up.

When Charlotte first came to me she was 40 years old.

Worked full time.

Had 2 kids.

And said she hadn't recognised the woman in the mirror for years.

She wasn't lazy.

She wasn't stupid.

And she definitely wasn't someone who didn't care.

In fact she cared so much it was destroying her.

She'd done Weight Watchers endless times.

She lost count of how many times she tried Slimming World.

She had a drawer full of diet books, read once, highlighted religiously…

But then quietly shelved when life got in the way.

And this is one of the biggest issues I see with women, and it’s why I keep going on about it.

Mums…and women are amazing, but most of them take on way more than their fair share of life.

I think It’s just in their nature.

In the face to face chat we had she told me something that I'll never forget.

She said:

"I was in Primark trying to find something to wear for my friend's birthday.

I must have tried on about 15 things.

Every single one made me feel worse than the last.

In the end I just sat down on the little bench in the changing room and cried.

Properly cried.

Then I wiped my face, put my own clothes back on, walked out, and bought a scented candle instead.

Because at least that would make me feel something good.

A scented candle.

Because it was the only thing in the shop she felt good about putting on her body.”

Let that sink in for a second.

This wasn't a woman who had given up.

This was a woman who was exhausted from trying and failing so many times.

That she'd started to believe the problem was HER.

That she was just one of those people who would never be able to shift the weight.

That her best years were behind her.

But she hadn't gone anywhere.

She was just buried.

Buried under years of bad information.

Buried under an industry that makes more money from your failure than your success.

Let me say that again because it matters.

The diet industry makes more money from your failure than your success.

Slimming World doesn't want you to hit your target weight and leave.

They want you to hit it, celebrate, then slowly slide back into old habits.

Because nothing actually changed in your lifestyle.

You gain it all back.

You feel ashamed.

You quietly re-join six months later.

That's their business model.

Like they even admit this.

And the worst part?

Charlotte believed it was HER fault.

So when she came to me she was sceptical.

And rightly so.

Why would this be any different?

She'd heard it all before.

She'd been promised results before.

I told her the truth.

I said: Look, I'm not going to tell you this is easy.

I'm not going to sell you a magic solution.

I'm not going to give you a meal plan full of foods you hate.

And tell you to just push through it.

What I AM going to do though is be in your corner every single day.

I'm going to tell you the truth even when you don't want to hear it.

I'm going to call you out when you're bullsh*tting yourself.

And I'm going to show you how to build a body you're proud of.

Without destroying your social life.

Without destroying your sanity.

She said yes.

But I’ll be honest, her answer didn’t fill me with confidence.

It felt more like a "I've got nothing left to lose" kinda yes.

You know that yes when you ask your partner to do something, and he says yes but now your annoyed that he’s coming because you know he doesn’t want to be there, ha.

About 3 months passed of her using my CORE4 system.

She went back to Primark.

Not because she had to.

Because she wanted to.

She tried on a dress.

A proper dress.

The kind she would have walked straight past 3 months ago.

She bought it.

Then she went back and bought two more.

She wore one of them to her works Christmas party.

Her work mate pulled her aside and said:

"I don't want to be weird but you look absolutely gorgeous."

"What are you doing?"

When she told me about that moment, she cried again.

But this time it wasn't in a changing room.

And it wasn't because she felt invisible.

It was because for the first time in years she felt like herself again.

That's what this is actually about.

Not the number on the scales.

Not the dress size.

Not the before and after photo.

It's about walking into a room and not immediately scanning it to see who looks better than you.

It's about getting dressed in the morning without it ruining your entire day.

It's about your partner looking at you the way he used to.

Charlotte isn't special.

I mean that in the nicest possible way.

She wasn't genetically gifted.

She didn’t have loads of spare time.

She was just a busy, normal woman who just had someone in her corner every single day.

Telling her the truth.

Showing her what actually works.

And here's the thing you need to understand:

You're not broken.

You never were.

The system was broken.

The industry was broken.

Your brain was just trying to protect you from another failure.

So here's what I want you to think about today:

When was the last time YOU felt like Charlotte did in that changing room?

When was the last time getting dressed made you cry?

Not from sadness.

But from feeling invisible in your own body?

And more importantly:

Do you believe that feeling can change for you?

Or have you decided you're just one of those people who'll never feel like that again?

Because Charlotte had decided that too.

Until she didn't.

And neither do you have to.

That’s it for today.

Nothing for you to buy.

Just a thought provoking email that I want you to read a couple of times.

Lynton

P.S. Charlotte said I could share her story.

She also said: "If it stops even one woman from buying a bloody candle instead of the dress then it's worth it."

Morning....

The accumulation of mini failures doesn't just cost you a gym membership or a meal plan.

It costs you something far more valuable: trust in yourself.

Here's what happens.

You start a new program.

You're excited.

You commit.

Then life gets messy

Work stress

Family chaos

An argument with your husband… that makes you miss a session.

Or you give in on your nutrition.

Or you even just...completely stop.

And your brain does what brains do when they've been disappointed over and over.

It stops believing you.

It gathers evidence.

Every broken promise.

Every failed attempt.

Every time you said "this time will be different" and it wasn't.

It builds a case against you, like you’re in a court room.

Bringing up every failure you’ve ever had.

See? I was right.

You can't do this.

You can't be trusted.

Now you're not just fighting a program.

You're fighting a voice that's learned to expect you to fail.

And that voice gets louder each time.

New PT?

Failed.

New diet?

Failed.

New program?

Failed.

Each time, a little bit of your confidence goes.

A little bit of your trust in yourself erodes.

And after enough failures, your brain re-writes the story:

"I'm not the kind of person who can change. I can't be trusted to follow through. I'm broken."

This used to happen to me too.

Especially in relationships.

Same pattern, different girl.

Decade of the same thing over and over, expecting it to magically be different.

My brain wasn't broken.

It was just trying to keep me safe.

But here's the truth nobody tells you.

Your brain isn't punishing you.

It's protecting you.

All it's doing is trying to keep you safe based on what it's learned.

So when you try a new PT with their

“Improved superfoods”…

Or their "magic exercises" …

As if that's going to remove the chaos of your household for the hours leading up to 8am…

Your brain already knows how this ends.

Because you're doing the same thing, expecting a different result.

The problem isn't you.

The problem is you've been trying to change in environments built for people without your life.

Without your stress.

Without your responsibilities.

Without your real world.

Generic programs don't account for a husband who's stressed.

A job that exhausts you.

A nervous system that's been in survival mode for years.

A need for wine on Friday nights and Sunday roasts with family.

So of course you fail.

And of course your brain stops trusting you.

You're not broken.

You've just been trying to change in an environment that was never designed for a woman like you.

With your life.

Your stress.

Your real world.

And your brain knows it.

So here's something worth sitting with today.

What would happen if, just once, you kept a small promise to yourself?

Not a 30-day challenge.

Not a complete life overhaul.

Not a new program.

Just one thing you said you'd do... and actually did it.

What would that do to the voice in your head?

What would it do to the story your brain's been telling for years?

Something to think about.

Lynton “just find one small thing to stick with” Dell

P.S. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. I spent a decade proving that one true.

Happy Friday…

When I first started re-emailing about a month ago Sarah replied.

She joined Unbreakable about 3000 days go.

She came in wanting to lose weight and get fit.

Sarah was a great client….as all of my clients are.

But here's what she wrote on that email:

“Well in those 2821 days I've had some big changes including a divorce and relocation to the North. So I wouldn't be able to rejoin which I would have seriously considered! I still remember how it gave me the bravery to do the winter wolf run with all those lovely ladies.

But I want you to know that the reason I came to you all those years ago was to get fit and lose weight to be able to have another child. And it worked and I did 🙂 I have a beautiful baby boy (not really a baby anymore 🫣). You played a big part in that so thank you! And I've managed to keep the mindset of moving more and eating better!”

Read that again.

"It gave me the bravery to do the winter wolf run with all those lovely ladies."

Not "I did it alone and got results."

"The bravery."

"Those lovely ladies."

Sarah lost weight because she learned the system.

And Sarah got pregnant because even after I closed.

She continued.

Doing everything that I taught her.

Despite me not being there.

Because she learnt a system she can follow even when life comes at you.

Through a divorce.

Through moving to the North.

Through raising a child.

But you know what she said?

"I would have seriously considered re-joining."

She said that about the studio.

About being around other women who were doing the same thing.

About the bravery she found there.

If you're here because you want to lose weight but you're also secretly hoping for something that's felt impossible...

This is the place for you.

If you want the bravery to do things you've never done before...

This is the place for you.

If you want to be part of something bigger than yourself...

That's what the Unbreakable50 is.

Speaking of bravery..

Let me write an email about a client I had called Shiran, she was super shy when I first met and suffered with crippling anxiety.

But after working with me I managed to convince her to do a charity boxing fight and box in front of hundreds of people.

That email is going to be epic.

Have an awesome weekend.

Stay tuned.

Lynton “what are scared of trying” Dell

P.S If this post helped and you want to see more of them direct in your email inbox so you don't miss out, sign up for my almost daily free emails here https://makemeunbreakable.com/email-opt-in/