Fierce AF Counsellors & Coaches

28/09/2026

♥️ Power 👑

Sometimes things flow beautifully between us and our clients.

We feel connected. They feel understood.
We seem to be seeing something together and all feels well in the therapeutic world.

But what happens when they disagree with us?

Can we remain just as open?

Or do we suddenly begin to believe they’re being resistant?
Wrong?
In denial?
Defensive?
Avoidant?

This really interests me.

Because if our client agrees with our understanding of her, perhaps we decide “we’re right”.

But what happens if she says:
“No. That isn’t what’s happening for me.”

Can we shift gear?
Can we get alongside her again?

Can we become genuinely curious about the possibility that Our understanding doesn’t resonate?

Can we let go of where are without needing to persuade her towards it?

Because if we continue to believe we are “right”, despite the person in front of us telling us that we are not, something important begins to happen.

The relationship changes.

She is no longer the authority on her own experience.

And this is fertile ground for rupture.

Perhaps she begins explaining herself harder.

Perhaps she goes quiet.

Perhaps she agrees because disagreeing feels pointless.

Perhaps she begins doubting what she knows.

Perhaps she decides she will never come back.

Or perhaps she becomes angry and pushes back - a wonderful breakthrough for her - if we can allow space for her to have her feelings…

Our theories need to remain something we hold lightly enough to put down.

They can help us become curious about the person, but I believe it is vital we never become more authoritative than the person herself.

Sometimes the most important thing I can do as a therapist when somebody says, “No, that isn’t it,” is not search for another way to explain why I think it IS.

It is to say:
“Thank you for saying. Please let me know how it is for you.”

And get back alongside her.

Because this is the point for me:

A woman needs to be able to disagree with me and discover that I am still right there.

Still interested.
Still listening.
Still willing to be changed by what she tells me.

That, for me, is part of holding therapeutic power responsibly.

Kas

27/09/2026

DID SHE LEAVE IMPRESSED BY ME
OR WITH MORE OF HERSELF? 👑

I think this is one of the questions therapists could ask ourselves far more often.

Because therapeutic work could quietly become very therapist-centred.

Our interpretation.
Our clever intervention.
Our favourite model.
Our expertise.
Our wish to get somewhere.
Our need to feel useful.

Anxiety can make us perform.
Inexperience can make us perform.

Sometimes even training cultures encourage us to ‘perform competence’.

But the client did not come into the room so that we could prove we know how to be a therapist.

Sometimes the most skilful thing we can do is;

Wait.
Wonder.
Stay.
Notice.
Admit I don’t know yet.

Let her lead me somewhere I wasn’t expecting.

For me, therapeutic maturity is not accumulating more and more interventions.

It is developing the discernment to know what belongs here and what doesn’t.

Maybe the question isn’t only:
“What can I do?”

Perhaps it is:
“What does this person actually need from me?”

And perhaps:
“did she leave with more of herself?”

I offer conversation for therapists and practitioners who want somewhere to bring the things they’re thinking about in their work without having to perform there either.

Kas
Fierce as f**k

27/09/2026

👑 THE PERSON BEFORE THE MODEL 🔥

One of the things I became increasingly wary of during my TA psychotherapy training was watching therapists learn a new model on Friday and be desperate to use it with clients on Monday.

A new set of circles.
A new triangle.
A new intervention.
A new formulation.

And suddenly everyone seems to fit it!
(Quite harmful imo)

I’m not against models.
I’ve trained in plenty of them.
But I think the order matters.

I don’t want to begin with:

“What model fits this person?”

I want to begin with:
Who is this person?
What is happening here?
What is emerging between us?
What might they need?

And only then:
Does anything I know have something useful to offer?

Because knowing how to do something is not the same as having a reason to do it.

The person does not exist so that I can demonstrate my training.

The person is the point.

Everything else is in service of them.

I offer a one-off conversation for therapists and practitioners who may be struggling with complexity, or want somewhere to think freely about their work, a client, a dilemma, themselves, or something they can’t quite get hold of.

Warmly
Kas

27/09/2026

🔥 PERHAPS YOU DON’T HAVE TO FIND THE NEXT THING…

What happens inside YOU when your client isn’t “getting better?”

When you’ve listened.
Wondered.
Read.
Taken it to supervision.
Tried what you know.

Perhaps introduced something experiential, somatic or creative.

And still they arrive next week in the same level of distress.

Do you start searching?
Another technique.
Another training.
Another intervention.
Another referral on?
Another thing you haven’t thought of yet.

And underneath all of that might be a frightened little question:

What am I missing?
Or an even more frightening one:
What if I’m not helping?
Not good enough…?

I understand that impulse enormously.
We care.

We Want the person sitting opposite us to suffer less.

But I think there is something really important for us to notice...

Our understandable desire to help can begin to create pressure for something to Happen or Change in our client.

And our client can feel it.

Perhaps they have already spent years feeling that they are:
Too difficult.
Too complicated.
Too damaged.
Too much.

The one who doesn’t respond properly.
The one who disappoints people.
The one nobody knows what to do with.

And now you are searching too.
A parallel process may be happening…

I wonder sometimes whether the most therapeutic thing we can do is stop searching for a moment.

Not stop caring.
Not stop thinking.
Not ignore risk.

Not abandon appropriate referral, medical treatment, supervision or professional responsibility.

But stop treating this human being as a problem for which we have not yet discovered the correct solution.

Perhaps you don’t have to find the next thing.

Perhaps something is already happening.

She stayed.
She told you something she has never told anyone else before.
She got angry with you.
She disagreed.
She cried and didn’t immediately apologise.
She laughed.
She asked for something.
She said no.
She noticed what happened in her body.

She wondered what SHE wanted rather than what everybody else needed from her.

She risked letting you matter.

These things may look small if we are searching for an OUTCOME.

Developmentally, they can be enormous.

I think sometimes we need enough confidence as therapists to tolerate the client’s pace.

To remain curious when we don’t know.

To resist making our client demonstrate that our therapy is working.

And to continue being deeply interested in the human being sitting opposite us.

Perhaps the question isn’t always:

“What else can I DO?”

Perhaps sometimes it is:

“What is already beginning to happen here that I might miss if I’m looking for something bigger?”

👑Kas
♥️Fierce as f**k for therapists

27/09/2026

👑THERAPY FOR THERAPISTS🔥

I offer therapy to those who are just starting out, and to those who have been doing this work for decades.

You might be finding your feet and wondering whether everyone else feels more confident than you do.

Or you might be very experienced, with people looking to you for all the answers, while privately wondering where YOU can take the things you’re carrying.

We can begin with whatever is true for you.

The love you have for your clients.
The tricky dynamic in your workplace.
The doubts.
The anger.
The exhaustion.
The things happening in your own life that make you question your own capacity as a therapist.

You don’t have to perform around me.

You can read about how I work here:
https://fierceasf.uk/therapy-for-therapists

Kas
fierce as f**k

Deeply relational therapy for women who are counsellors, psychotherapists or supervisors and need somewhere they do not have to perform professional competence.

26/09/2026

👑 Therapy For Therapists 🔥

Being a therapist can be a very lonely job.

We spend so much of our working lives listening, noticing, holding complexity and staying present with other people’s pain.

But where do YOU go with your own?

Perhaps you love your work yet you may also feel exhausted.

Perhaps you’re furious about something that’s happened.

Perhaps you’re doubting yourself, grieving, feeling ashamed, or struggling with something you can’t yet put into words.

You don’t have to arrive knowing...

You don’t have to perform professional competence with me.

And you do not have to make yourself smaller in order to be met.

I’ve been a therapist for 27 years, and I offer deeply relational, experiential therapy for counsellors, psychotherapists, supervisors and other therapeutic practitioners.

We begin exactly where you are.

You can read more here:

https://fierceasf.uk/therapy-for-therapists

Kas
Fierce as F**k Practitioners

Deeply relational therapy for women who are counsellors, psychotherapists or supervisors and need somewhere they do not have to perform professional competence.

24/09/2026

Therapy for Therapists

Deeply relational therapy for women who are counsellors, psychotherapists or supervisors and need somewhere they do not have to perform professional competence.

19/09/2026

Supervision is meant to offer a place where honest disclosure is possible.

A place where a therapist can say:

“I am struggling.”

“Something happened with a client and I feel unsettled by it.”

“I think I may have made a mistake.”

“I am concerned about what this might mean.”

And be met with curiosity, care and thoughtful professional challenge.

Without humiliation, punishment or the immediate assumption that they’ve failed.

I know supervision also carries responsibility. Supervisors may sometimes need to ask difficult questions, name concerns or take action where somebody may be at risk.

But supervision also contains power, however collaborative we would like the relationship to be.

A supervisee may be quietly wondering:

Will I be judged?
Will this be written down?
Will my fitness to practise be questioned?
Will my training or placement be affected?
Will what I say later be used against me?

If a supervisee begins editing themselves, offering only the safest version or concealing what is really happening, I don’t think we should automatically decide that they are resistant, defensive or unwilling to reflect.

Perhaps they have learned that honesty is not safe in that particular relationship or system.

Supervision does not need to be endlessly comfortable. Growth rarely is. But challenge without sufficient safety can very easily become compliance, silence and fear.

For me, good supervision makes room for uncertainty, complexity, difference, vulnerability and repair. It allows the therapist to be a human being as well as a practitioner.

Sometimes the supervisee has not failed to use supervision well.

Sometimes supervision has failed to become safe enough to use honestly.

And I think we need to be able to talk about that.

Kas Martin
Fierce As F**k for Therapists
Working at the edge while holding the line.



**kForTherapists

19/09/2026

A therapist raises a serious ethical concern at work.

Instead of examining what she has identified, the organisation begins examining her.

Her tone. Her emotional response.
Her history. Her personality.

Whether she is a “good fit” for the team.
Whether she is resilient enough.
Whether she is becoming too involved.

The original concern quietly disappears and the woman who raised it becomes the new “problem”.

Eventually, she may become anxious, physically unwell, unable to sleep and frightened of saying anything at all.

Then her distress is presented as further evidence that she was the problem all along.

This can be particularly powerful within psychology, psychiatry, social work and healthcare, where professional language can be used to make the dismissal sound compassionate, clinical and reasonable.

Therapy with me offers you the opportunity to explore what happened, to be seen and heard, and believed.

We can look at the hierarchy.
The ethical concern.
What belongs to you and what never did.

If you have been left doubting yourself after speaking out about something that felt profoundly wrong, you are welcome to contact me privately.

Kas Martin
Fierce As F**k

17/09/2026

Perhaps you did not burn out because you lacked resilience.

Perhaps you were repeatedly asked to practise inside conditions that violated what you knew about human beings.

Too many clients, never enough time.

Commissioning targets taking priority over care.

People discharged because their allocated sessions had ended - not because the work was complete.

Clinical responsibility without the authority to change anything.

Knowing what someone needed and being prevented from providing it.

And what happens when we say that we are struggling to cope with this?

We know our truth is not safe there.

Our honesty may be treated as evidence that we lack resilience or are somehow not fit for work.

So we pay privately for therapy or supervision.

We pay from our own pockets for somewhere to speak about the harm created by the system that employs us.

Then we work even harder to adapt.
To cope better.

To become resilient enough to tolerate the intolerable.

Perhaps the question is not only:
“What is wrong with me?”

Perhaps it is:
“What have I been required to participate in and what has that cost me?”

If you need somewhere outside the organisation to think about this honestly, you are welcome to contact me.

🔥 Kas Martin ♥️
👑 Fierce As F**k Therapy for Therapists