Purple Iris Coaching

💜 Who is the woman beneath all the roles?💜

You may be someone’s partner, mum, daughter, grandmother, colleague, friend or carer.

You may be the organiser, the peacekeeper, the reliable one and the person everyone calls when something needs sorting out.

But beneath everything you do for everybody else, there is still you.
The woman with her own hopes.
Her own needs.
Her own interests.
Her own dreams.
Her own idea of what she would like the next part of her life to look like.

Sometimes, we become so used to being needed that we stop asking ourselves what we need.
We know everyone else’s appointments, worries, preferences and plans—but when somebody asks, “What do you want?” we don’t know how to answer.

💜 Regain 💜 is about finding your way back to the woman beneath the roles.
Not by walking away from the people you love, but by remembering that you belong in your life too.
If you took away all the roles and responsibilities for a moment, how would you describe the woman underneath them?

When did being a good woman become synonymous with putting yourself last?💜

Being a good mum.
A good partner.
A good daughter.
A good friend.
A good employee.

Somehow, for so many of us, being “good” became about being available.
Helpful.
Dependable.
Easy to rely on.

We say yes when we'd rather say no.
We rearrange our plans.
We feel guilty when we choose ourselves.
And sometimes we don't even realise we're doing it.

But here's the question I've been thinking about:

Who decided that being a good woman meant putting yourself at the bottom of your own list?
What if being a good woman could also mean protecting your time?
Having dreams that belong to you.
Letting other people solve their own problems.
Saying no without writing an essay explaining why.

Doing something simply because you want to.
And recognising that your happiness matters too.
Maybe putting yourself back on the list doesn't make you selfish.
Maybe it means you've finally realised that you belong on it 💜

I'd love to know:
What were you taught a “good woman” should be?

Ladies 💜

Sometimes, the easier option is to put everyone else first. Why? Because that is what so many of us have got used to doing.

We sort the children, our partners, we help with our grandchildren, we check our parents are okay.
We organise the house, the appointments.

We solve the problems, and when someone asks:
“What do YOU want?”

We can’t or don’t know how or what to answer because we have normalised feeling uncomfortable about putting ourselves first.

So, we tell ourselves…
I’ll do it when things calm down, when the kids don’t need me as much, when work is less busy, when I’ve got more time…

There will always be a good reason not to put yourself first no matter what life is like. This is something I’ve thought about a lot whilst creating REgain.

So becoming the CEO of your own life doesn’t mean you stop caring for the people you love.
It just means you stop disappearing from your own life while you’re doing it.

If you became the CEO of your own life today, what’s one thing you would do differently?

I’d genuinely love to know 💜

Ladies , it’s time to share my news with you 💜

Some of you know me as an acupuncturist,
Some of you know me as a coach, Some of you may know that I'm now writing too, and some of you have probably followed me for a while and wondered how all of those things fit together!

So, I thought it was time to reintroduce myself!

I'm Victoria Horsley.

For a long time, I thought my purpose was defined by what I did. But I've realised that acupuncture, coaching and writing are simply different ways of doing the thing I care most deeply about:
Helping women rediscover who they are.

Because I see so many women who have spent years being everything to everyone. We're partners. Mothers. Daughters. Grandmothers. Friends. Colleagues. Carers. Organisers. Problem-solvers.

We're the ones who remember the birthdays, organise the appointments, make sure everyone is okay and somehow keep everything moving.
✨And we're incredibly good at it✨

But sometimes, somewhere amongst all that doing, we lose sight of ourselves.

‼️We become the Operations Director of everyone else's life...
..when actually, we should be the CEO of our own. ‼️

That doesn't mean loving our families less.
It doesn't mean abandoning our responsibilities.
And it certainly doesn't mean becoming selfish.
It means recognising that we matter too.
It means knowing who we are beyond the roles we play.
Making time for the things that make us feel alive.
Saying a meaningful "no" sometimes.
Letting the people we love do more for themselves.
Making decisions based on what we actually want—not simply what everyone else expects from us.
And perhaps asking ourselves one of the most important questions of all:

If I were looking back on my life one day, what would I regret not doing?

This is the thinking behind something I've been quietly creating called REgain—a coaching programme for women who are asking:
"What now?"
"Is this it for me?"
or even...
"When did I stop being me?"

I'll be sharing much more about REgain and the journey behind it over the coming weeks.

But for today, I simply wanted to say hello again.
I'm Victoria. Acupuncturist. Coach. Writer in progress…

And a huge believer that it's never too late to take your seat as the CEO of your own life.
Maybe it's time to start your next chapter too. 💜

🌿 Feeling stuck? Like you’ve lost a part of yourself along the way? 🌿

Maybe life looks fine on the outside… but inside, something’s missing.

You’re not alone — and you don’t have to stay stuck.

Regain is my coaching course designed specifically for women who are ready to take back control of their lives.

Whether you’re in your 40s, 50s, 60s or beyond — this is your time.
To rediscover your confidence.
To reconnect with your passions.
To remember who you are underneath the roles, responsibilities and routines.

💜 Regain gives you the space, support and tools to:
✔ Find clarity
✔ Reignite your spark
✔ Create real, lasting change — on your terms

Because it’s not too late. You’re not too far gone.
You haven’t missed your chance.

✨ You’re just getting started. ✨

If something in you is saying “I want more” — listen to it.
Join Regain. You’ll be so glad you did.

👉 Message me to find out more or comment “INTERESTED” below and I’ll be in touch.