Ruth Pearson - Forward Living

This morning I was up early. I didn’t have work, but I did need to drop my youngest at work for 5am.

Back home I made myself a cuppa and thought about what I wanted/needed to get done today. So many ideas 💡 swirling round my head. I couldn’t work out which one should get priority.

I could feel that familiar sense of overwhelm starting to creep in; the thoughts that accompany it:

“if you were a better person you could do it all”,

“what’s wrong with you, why can’t you keep on top of everything?”,
“honestly you’re just lazy sitting there with a cuppa.”,

“why can’t you go on a bike ride, pay your bills, write an email, reply to a message, clean the house, sort the hedge out, run your business at the same time right this minute?”.

Thankfully with a lot of work and support I’ve learned to acknowledge these thoughts, acknowledge that they are just thoughts, not reality, and slow myself space to breathe.

I sat with my cuppa, and did a brain dump. This is where everything in you mental “got to get it done now or I’m failing” list, gets put on paper (or your notes in your phone), and gets them out of your head.

I drank some more tea, looked at the list and realised most of the stuff on it wasn’t stuff that could be or needed to be sorted right here right now in this moment, and therefore having it rattling round my head causing the sirens to go off wasn’t helpful.

So I gave myself permission to put them down. Interestingly one thing that never seems to make it into this list of urgency is self-care, “sit and drink your tea and take a moment” never appears as a sense of urgency or something important that needs attention, yet it was probably the single most useful thing I did.

Taking time to give myself space to see the bigger picture, space to breathe and to allow my nervous system to calm down was the single most effective way of managing this impossible list of tasks in my head.

Next time you feel that sense of urgency and panic, try taking 5 mins to breathe, write it all down, then look at that list as if it belonged to a friend. This helps with clarity on where to focus your energy and takes the urgency and panic down several notches # # #

This gorgeous girl is staying with us for a couple of days, she is a big softie, but she is not a clean dog.

My living room looks like I’ve had a team of toddlers racing around, and on this morning’s walk she found something delightfully stinky, brown, and fishy to roll meaning a shower for her when we got back.

But it got me out for a walk in the rain which is a welcome relief after the weeks of dry hot weather. I could almost hear the trees breathing a sigh of relief.

I love listening to the rain on the tree canopy, the birds, and the movement of the plants in the breeze. It’s so calming, even with stinky, messy, beautiful pebble careering round the place.

A busy but interesting start to the day ❤️♥️❤️

How has your day started?

Apparently it’s single working women’s day!

I didn’t even know this was a thing, but you know what I’ll take it. Here I am a single woman, raised my kids, worked, and studied.

Now I’m going through the peri menopause, my kids have mostly flown the nest, and I’m enjoying single life.

There was a time where I hated being single, mainly because I didn’t love myself enough so I looked for that love else where.

Now I enjoy having my bed to myself, especially as I often wake up at 2-4am with night sweats!! The only man allowed in my bed is Alfie because he doesn’t make me feel like s**t. If I wake up at 3am and wake him up he’s just happy to see me no grumpiness.

Life is still hard at times, but now I appreciate all the things that I always had but never felt I deserved.

So to all the women out there juggling family, single life/ and married or partnered life, and work!!

You’re all super heroes!!!!

♥️❤️🩷♥️❤️

I’ve been a bit quiet this last week because I started a new part time job that involves getting up at 4am and being on my feet till 1pm.

It’s taking a bit of time for my body to adjust, to the physical element of the job and mentally to the change in routine and early starts.

Today I woke up feeling very achy, not helped by hormones and a cold, but I’ve took it slow and am feeling ready for the day ahead, even if it looks a bit gentle.

I’ve been learning to work with my body rather than against it. It’s interesting that generally jobs don’t allow for this, they’re about getting every bit of worth that they can out of a person by pushing them to be faster, do more, go above and beyond. This need to get more quicker creates a sense of panic which impacts our bodies and how they work, leading to burnout and mental health difficulties.

So how do we counter act this?

For me it’s having boundaries, making sure I give myself down time, I know when I’ve been around people I need time to myself to decompress and recover. When I allow my body what it needs then I can work more clearly and quicker because panic is no longer flooding my body and running the show.

How do you decompress from work?

Today should be interesting, I will be having my two grand fur babies for the day, first time having both of them at mine. Alfie might not be impressed having two energetic pups (well year old) collie & collie x lab.

I will certainly be kept busy but it’s also a privilege that my kids are happy to leave their babies with me whether that be the human or furry kind.

Today is likely to be slightly chaotic with plenty of funny moments involved.

What is your Saturday looking like?