The Mother Goddess

I think it’s time we talk about this.

We plan weddings down to the last detail and show up to postpartum with nothing but good intentions and dry shampoo.

That gap has real consequences: for our body, for our mental health, for our relationships.

Comment 🦋 and I’ll send you the link for Chrysalis — because postpartum is not something to endure or quickly move through.

It’s one of the most profound initiations you will ever pass through. And you were never meant to do it alone.

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Everyone tells a woman that her life will change when she becomes a mother, but nobody actually prepares her for the part where she can’t recognize herself.

And when that happens, the first thing the system offers her is a pill - prescribed in a 10 minute appointment by someone who never asked a single question about her birth experience, her support network, or what her days actually look like at home.

I hear this constantly from the mothers I work with, and after a while you stop being surprised and start connecting the dots.

Because what nobody in that appointment room wants to say out loud is that a lot of what we call postpartum depression is actually a completely sane response to an insane situation – a traumatic or overly medicalised birth, no village, no rest, no rite of passage. Just a “you look great, see you at your 6 week check” and a wave out the door.

The medical system isn’t set up to give you a village, but it IS set up to manage your symptoms when the absence of one makes you fall apart.

And that’s a dot worth connecting.
Medication is not always the wrong answer, but it is too often the ONLY one on offer, and that matters.

You aren’t broken. You are under-supported, and there’s a very big difference between the two.

This is exactly why I created Chrysalis.
— a postpartum program built around what a mother needs during those first six weeks: rest, nourishment, nervous system care, and a community of women who get it. The village the system never gave you.

Link in bio if you want to know more.

And tell me below – did you feel supported postpartum, or just managed?

This may sound crazy, but the hardest thing for me and almost all the Mothers I know was, without any shadow of doubt, asking for and accepting help.

Everyone around me was saying “I’m here if you need anything.”

And I kept responding “I’m fine, thank you” with a smile on my face while I was completely falling apart on the inside.

The truth? After a lifetime of being trained by society to be a “strong and independent woman” by any means necessary, the simple thought of asking for help was giving me huge anxiety.

The discomfort and awkwardness of showing up vulnerable and undone, even in front of family and friends was so fu***ng real — and it seemed way worse than sucking it up and figuring it out alone.

A part of me believed that a good mother should be able to deal with all things motherhood on her own. And another part of me was just so exhausted I didn’t even know what I needed.

The shift happened when a friend (who was also a mother herself) sat me down and said “I’m glad to hear that you’re fine but now I’d like you to stop being polite and tell me one thing I can do for you right now. I’m not leaving until you do.”

I burst into tears because I finally had permission to be honest. So I dared asking her for what I needed: “Can you come over on Thursday and take her out to the park for two hours while I shower and sleep?”

It felt strange and uncomfortable at first, as if I was speaking a completely new language to a total stranger. But I did it. Then I did it again. And again.

And people showed up. In ways I never expected. Because they wanted to help all along. They just didn’t know how.

If you’re in the thick of it right now, I want you to hear this. You are not a burden. You are not weak.

You are a Mother who has created and is sustaining another life from her own body, energy and time.

And you deserve a village that actually shows up. But you might have to let them in first.

🍯 If you want to learn more about being a well resourced Mother — comment VILLAGE below and I’ll send you an invitation when my postpartum group journey PASSAGE is open for enrollment.

Long before books and experts, women learned about birth and motherhood from other women. In circles, in kitchens, in whispers passed down through generations.

The lineage of women who came before us knew something about the thresholds we cross in pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood. They gathered. They shared. They passed it on. And somehow, even across centuries, that thread still reaches us.

Last week, we gathered inside The Mother Goddess Path — tracing the stories of the Goddess through the lens of the feminine life cycle, and feeling how ancient myth speaks directly to the modern experience of becoming a mother.

If you missed it, or if you’ve been feeling quietly called to this kind of work, you can still catch the recording.

Comment PATH below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

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