Alex Bakowski

17/09/2026

Most people think the gap between who they are and who they want to be is a motivation problem. Set a clearer goal, want it more, try harder.

It's not.

It's an attention problem.

You already know what you want to do differently.

Eat better, respond instead of react, be present with your kids instead of half-scrolling next to them. The knowing was never the issue.

What's missing is the trained ability to actually be where your feet are, long enough for that intention to turn into a different action. Without that, even the clearest goals quietly slide back into old patterns.

This is the part of change work most people skip entirely, because it's less exciting than a new plan. But it's the part that actually works.

Follow along ( ) for more on what building that skill looks like in real life.

16/09/2026

Here's what that statistic actually means in practice. Nearly half your waking life, you're physically somewhere and mentally somewhere else entirely.

Sounds pretty disturbing, right?

I see this with the women I coach.

They're in the school pickup line, replaying a work email. They're in a client meeting, mentally drafting dinner. They're technically present for their own life, most of the time, but rarely actually in it.

The cost isn't just missed moments. It's decision fatigue, burnout, and a nagging sense that life is happening around you rather than through you.

The fix isn't more discipline or a better to-do list. It's learning to notice when you've left the room in your head, and gently bringing yourself back. That's a trainable skill, I help women in leadership and business do this in my day-to-day coaching work.

Follow along ( ) if you want more on what that training actually looks like.

15/09/2026

A client gave me feedback on our work together, and it is too good not to share.

"Working with Alex has been such a positive experience for me and has really helped me reflect on myself and how I show up as a leader. She creates a genuinely safe space where I feel comfortable sharing my thoughts and feelings openly, without ever feeling judged or like there is a 'right' answer I should be getting to.

I'm normally someone who doesn't particularly enjoy these types of sessions, but with Alex it never really feels like coaching. It feels conversational and natural, almost like brainstorming with a friend who knows exactly the right questions to ask.

Alex doesn't give me the answers or tell me what I should do. Instead, she has an incredible ability to ask the right questions, challenge my thinking and help me hone in on what I'm actually thinking and feeling. When I get stuck in my own head, she helps me look at things from a completely different perspective and gives me the space to find my own way through it.

Working with Alex has helped me become much more reflective, trust my own judgement and listen to my inner voice, both personally and as a leader. I always walk away from our sessions with greater clarity and usually thinking about something in a way I hadn't considered before."

No answers handed over. Just the right questions to help create the right transformation.

I know what you want is the answer. But any coach who promises to hand it to you won't actually deliver the transformation you need.

If you want a no BS approach, and someone in your corner while you find your own way through it, hit follow. I share weekly content on what real change actually looks like.

10/09/2026

09/09/2026

Most business advice assumes the founder is fine.

That if she just improved her strategy, marketing or time management, things would shift.

But what I see is different.

The business isn’t always the bottleneck. It’s the internal capacity of the woman running it.

When something wobbles… a quiet launch, a slow sales cycle, a client who pulls back - what shifts first?

Your strategy…

or your nervous system?

Because that might be the real problem we’re not talking about.

Not focussing on yourself enough? Try it, you’ll be surprised what changes in your business (and its growth).

08/09/2026

Yes, grow yourself, grow everything else around you.

A client who has seen transformation shared this with me (yes, it is a long one and she wrote this directly to my Google Reviews page!)

"I have been working with Alex Bakowski since March, and the progress I have made in such a short period of time has been remarkable...

Although our formal sessions are fortnightly, her support extends well beyond them. She checks in by message and offers a quick call when something needs to be worked through rather than waiting for the next session. At one point, she even met me face to face at 5:30am to help me kick-start a morning routine I was struggling to establish. I was genuinely blown away by that level of commitment.

She's incredibly thorough. She holds me accountable, tracks my progress, and creates visual memory boards documenting important conversations, insights and action plans. At the same time, she's extremely dynamic. We might arrive with one plan for a session, but within five minutes she can recognise there's another layer to explore and confidently take us there.

She challenges me, effortlessly identifies when I'm self-sabotaging or being unnecessarily hard on myself, and isn't afraid to hold me accountable. At the same time, I feel completely safe being my authentic self with her. I trust that she has my back, no matter what comes out in a session.

If you're looking for a coach who will not only support you but challenge you, understand you and genuinely move you forward, I couldn't recommend Alex more highly."

This is what I am about. No flashy promise, just the actual work, and the actual impact.

That's the version of this I'm willing to keep building. Link in bio if you want to talk about what real support looks like.

07/09/2026

My mum's in her 70s and still gets up at 5am to run around a lake before sunrise. Something I really admire about her.

But one night over dinner, she said she "had" to get up and do it. I suggested a reframe. She dismissed it as semantics and went back to her earl grey. Fair enough.

I don't give up so easily with my own kids though. I've been slowly, consistently reinforcing a different way of talking about our lives, not always sure if any of it's actually sinking in.

Then I got a story from my husband, after a physio appointment with our son, that answered that question for me.

In this week's Optimal You, I share what happened, and why I think there's real power in the words we use to talk about the lives we've building.

You can read it here:
https://www.alexbakowski.com/optimal-you?utm_medium=organic%social&utm_source=facebook%&utm_campaign=always%on&utm_content=educational &utmc_placement=post

02/09/2026

There’s a moment I see all the time.

A woman who owns her own business who has done everything “right.”

She’s invested in strategy, marketing, systems and business courses. She’s not lazy, unclear or incapable.

But she is carrying something invisible.

The constant mental rehearsal, the quiet self-doubt and the pressure to prove herself. She also has the inability to switch off.

And that internal load slows ex*****on far more than any marketing funnel ever could.

Most business advice assumes the founder is fine. But sustainable growth doesn’t start with another tactic. It starts with strengthening the woman running the business.

If you want to understand what is really holding you back from scaling your business, book in a free coaching diagnostic via the link in my bio.

01/09/2026

Burnout isn’t always about hours worked.

More often, it is about the weight you are carrying in your head.

The constant tracking, anticipating and problem-solving. The invisible planning that runs in the background of your day. The sense that if you do not think three steps ahead, something important will fall through the cracks.

For many high-achieving women, that vigilance has become second nature. It feels responsible, necessary and like leadership.

But over time, living in a state of permanent responsibility keeps your nervous system slightly elevated. Even when you stop moving, your mind does not. Even when you sit down to rest, part of you is still managing.

If you have learned that your value comes from holding everything together, then of course letting go feels unsafe.

Of course delegation feels risky and slowing down feels indulgent.

Flow Coaching works at that deeper level. It is not about squeezing more productivity out of an already stretched system. It is about updating the internal patterns that keep you in vigilance mode, so that performance becomes sustainable rather than exhausting.

If you are tired of carrying so much alone, there is another way to operate.