This isn’t a cleaning video. It’s an executive functioning strategy.
I stood in my kitchen after a dinner with friends feeling overwhelmed.
Not because I didn’t know how to clean it. Not because I didn’t want it done.
I was overwhelmed by where to start.
Many of the clients I work with describe this experience. It can look like procrastination, but often it’s something else entirely: immobilisation, decision paralysis, or executive functioning overload.
Questions start piling up:
Where do I begin?
What’s the most important thing?
What if I don’t finish?
What if I start in the wrong place?
What if it takes all day?
The task itself isn’t always the problem. Sometimes it’s the mental load of all the decisions surrounding it.
What helped me today wasn’t motivation.
I decided to film a timelapse.
Without really thinking about it, I changed the task from:
“I need to clean the kitchen.”
to
“I’m making a video about getting unstuck.”
The filming added novelty, accountability, and a sense of purpose. It became a form of self-monitoring and even a kind of body doubling. Most importantly, it gave me a starting point.
And once I started moving, the next step became easier to find.
A reminder for anyone feeling stuck today:
You don’t always need more motivation.
Sometimes you just need a different way into the task. ❤️
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18/08/2026
What a privilege it was to spend the evening with the Annesley community as part of the Dare to Become Parenting Series.
Tonight we explored a simple but powerful shift: moving from theorising about our children’s behaviour to becoming genuinely curious about their experience. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with them?” we explored questions like, “What’s making this hard?” and “What might I not understand yet?”
We also talked about the importance of having the hard conversations ourselves rather than outsourcing them, and how connection, curiosity and collaboration can transform conflict into an opportunity for understanding.
Thank you to all the parents who attended, reflected, questioned and shared. Parenting was never meant to be done perfectly, but it was always meant to be done in relationship. ❤️
17/08/2026
After spending the morning teaching postgrad psychology students about couples therapy, I found myself thinking about relationship research while cooking dinner tonight.
Not because my husband and I were discussing attachment theory over the stove, but because the small everyday moments we talked about in class showed up in our kitchen.
Tonight’s dinner was our homemade version of Ying Chow’s famous BBC. Like many Adelaide locals, Ying Chow has become part of our story over the years, and recreating our favourite dish at home has become one of our relationship rituals.
As I was juggling ingredients and feeling a little stretched, I mentioned I needed a hand. Without hesitation, my husband noticed and got the rice started.
In Gottman’s therapy work, that’s called a bid for connection; those small moments where we reach out to our partner, often in subtle ways. And just as importantly, it’s about turning toward those bids by noticing, responding and showing up.
The research tells us that healthy relationships aren’t built on grand romantic gestures alone. They’re built through thousands of everyday moments of connection.
Tonight’s rice wasn’t really about rice.
It was about partnership, shared meaning, and one of the simple rituals that has become part of our life together.
The more I work with couples, the more I appreciate that strong relationships are often built through small moments of noticing, responding, repairing and reconnecting.
And sometimes they look a lot like homemade BBC and fried rice on a Monday night. ❤️🍚🥢
17/08/2026
A huge thank you to the postgraduate psychology students and teaching team at Flinders University for allowing me to lead such an engaged and thoughtful discussion today.
We explored Couples Therapy, the broader evidence base for relationship interventions, ethical dilemmas in couples work, neurodiversity, cultural considerations, and the complexities of helping people navigate intimate relationships.
One of the strongest reminders for me was that whilst therapeutic models are useful, good psychology ultimately comes down to curiosity, formulation, critical thinking, and genuine human connection.
Thank you for having me back. It was a pleasure to spend the morning with you all. ❤️
Flinders University
11/08/2026
Such a lovely day facilitating a Relaxation and Stress Management group with current serving members, veterans and family members.
We spent the day exploring stress, the nervous system, grounding, mindfulness, resilience and practical strategies to support wellbeing in everyday life. More importantly, we shared stories, wisdom, laughter and genuine connection.
I always leave these groups feeling grateful. It is a privilege to spend time with people who have given so much, and to witness the insight, strength and generosity they bring to the room.
A special thank you to my wonderful co-facilitator, Adriana from ThrivePath Pty Ltd - your warmth, wisdom and calm presence helped create such a safe and welcoming space. ❤️
30/07/2026
We're pleased to share that Inke Jones has increased her availability for child psychological assessments from 7 August.
Inke provides neurodivergent-affirming assessments for Autism, ADHD, learning disorders, cognitive profiles, giftedness, and intellectual disability.
If you're seeking greater understanding of your child's unique strengths and support needs, our friendly team would love to help.
📍 Wayville
📧 [email protected]
📞 0412 779 771
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30/07/2026
~ International Day of Friendship ~
Fifteen years ago, a group of friends climbed onto a wagon and took what we still refer to as our "country music album cover" photo.
There was no grand plan behind it. Someone suggested it. Everyone went along with it. We all pulled our most demure expressions. And somehow, what was probably meant to be a throwaway photo became one of those moments that has stayed with us ever since.
Every year or two, someone rediscovers it, sends it to the group, and we laugh together all over again.
What I love most isn't the photo itself. It's what the photo represents.
Friendship, for me, has never been about big gestures or perfectly curated moments. It's the people who are willing to be spontaneous when an opportunity presents itself. The people who humour your ridiculous ideas. The people who turn an ordinary afternoon into a memory you'll still be talking about 15 years later. The people who help create stories that become part of your shared history.
As a psychologist, I spend a lot of time thinking about what makes life meaningful. We often assume it's the major milestones that matter most. But when I look back, many of the moments I treasure are surprisingly ordinary.
A conversation. A meal. A shared joke that somehow never stops being funny. An impromptu photo on a wagon.
The older I get, the more I appreciate friendships that have accumulated layers of memories. The kind where a single photo can instantly transport you back to a particular place, a particular season of life, and the people who were there beside you.
This photo reminds me that friendship isn't just about having people in your life. It's about creating a life together, one small, often unplanned moment at a time.
Happy International Day of Friendship – today, I’m celebrating the people who say, "Sure, why not?" and climb onto the wagon with me. ❤️
23/07/2026
We're pleased to share that Inke Jones has increased her availability for child psychological assessments from 7 August.
Inke provides neurodivergent-affirming assessments for Autism, ADHD, learning disorders, cognitive profiles, giftedness, and intellectual disability.
If you're seeking greater understanding of your child's unique strengths and support needs, our friendly team would love to help.
📍 Wayville
📧 [email protected]
📞 0412 779 771
What if guilt isn't the problem?
As I headed out for my first Tuesday evening walk after three weeks of school holidays, I found myself reflecting on something that has been coming up again and again in conversations with clients, colleagues, and in my own life: guilt.
Many of us spend a lot of time trying to get rid of guilt.
We feel guilty for not working hard enough. For not being more present with our families. For not responding to emails. For not catching up with friends. For not doing more.
We often see guilt as something negative - an emotion that shouldn't be there.
But what if guilt is actually telling us something important?
In my experience, guilt often points us towards what we value most. It reflects our care, our commitment, our relationships, and the things that matter deeply to us. The very fact that we feel guilty can be evidence of our love, our responsibility, and our desire to live in line with our principles.
The challenge is that guilt doesn't disappear simply because we want it to. Like most emotions, it arrives uninvited.
Instead of fighting it, perhaps we can make some space for it.
We can acknowledge what it's telling us, recognise the values beneath it, and then make thoughtful choices about how we want to spend our time and energy - even when guilt comes along for the ride.
Because sometimes there isn't a perfect choice. Sometimes we're balancing competing priorities, and no matter what we choose, a little guilt will show up.
I've learned that I don't have to wait for guilt to disappear before I do what's important.
Sometimes I simply take it with me on the walk.
In this video, I share my reflections on guilt, values, and why making room for uncomfortable emotions can help us live more meaningfully.
I'd love to hear your thoughts: What has guilt taught you about what matters most in your life?
What if guilt isn't the problem?
As I headed out for my first Tuesday evening walk after three weeks of school holidays, I found myself reflecting on something that has been coming up again and again in conversations with clients, colleagues, and in my own life: guilt.
Many of us spend a lot of time trying to get rid of guilt.
We feel guilty for not working hard enough. For not being more present with our families. For not responding to emails. For not catching up with friends. For not doing more.
We often see guilt as something negative - an emotion that shouldn't be there.
But what if guilt is actually telling us something important?
In my experience, guilt often points us towards what we value most. It reflects our care, our commitment, our relationships, and the things that matter deeply to us. The very fact that we feel guilty can be evidence of our love, our responsibility, and our desire to live in line with our principles.
The challenge is that guilt doesn't disappear simply because we want it to. Like most emotions, it arrives uninvited.
Instead of fighting it, perhaps we can make some space for it.
We can acknowledge what it's telling us, recognise the values beneath it, and then make thoughtful choices about how we want to spend our time and energy - even when guilt comes along for the ride.
Because sometimes there isn't a perfect choice. Sometimes we're balancing competing priorities, and no matter what we choose, a little guilt will show up.
I've learned that I don't have to wait for guilt to disappear before I do what's important.
Sometimes I simply take it with me on the walk.
In this video, I share my reflections on guilt, values, and why making room for uncomfortable emotions can help us live more meaningfully.
I'd love to hear your thoughts: What has guilt taught you about what matters most in your life?
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