Vanessa Allen Coaching

I absolutely adore being outside, especially in this beautiful weather.

This is me (again 😊) at RHS Wisley last week.

I did take a photo of myself sitting side-on on a bench, trying to look all professional and reflective. I looked an absolute plonker 😂 so here’s the one with the big grin instead.

Two thirds of my working week I’m a leader in primary care. The other third, I coach people.

And one of my favourite things about coaching is the look on someone’s face when something suddenly makes sense.

That mixture of surprise and wonder when they realise that something they’ve believed about themselves for years, or a way they’ve been making decisions without even thinking about it, has a story behind it.

“Oh my goodness… THAT’S why I do that.”

Sometimes we can trace it back years. To something someone said, something that happened, or a role they learned to play without ever consciously choosing it.

I never get tired of seeing that moment.

Because when you realise what’s been quietly influencing you, you can start deciding for yourself what you want to keep and what you don’t.

That’s the kind of work I do.

And I currently have two spaces for 1:1 coaching from September.

You don’t need to know exactly what you want to change before we talk. That’s often where the work starts.

If you’re curious, send me a message.

Vanessa x

“I’d love to, but…”

I wonder how many times we say this without really thinking about it.

I’d love to change jobs, but I’m too old to start again.

I’d love to work fewer hours, but I can’t justify it.

I’d love to travel more, but it’s not practical.

I’d love to have a bit more time for me, but there’s always something (or someone!) else that needs sorting first.

It’s something I notice when I’m talking to people.

They mention something they’d really love to do and their whole face changes. They smile, become more animated, there’s suddenly a bit more energy there.

And then comes the BUT.

All the reasons they can’t, shouldn’t, or probably won’t.

Of course, real life comes with responsibilities.

But maybe we’re sometimes a little too quick to dismiss the bit that came before the “but”.

So I’d love to know…

How would you finish the sentence?

“I’d love to…”

Tell me below, or if your answer feels a bit too personal for the comments, send me a message instead.

I’d genuinely love to hear it. ❤️

Vanessa x

When did you last do something simply because you wanted to?

Not because it was productive.

Not because somebody needed you.

Not because it was on the list.

Just because you fancied it.

We can get so used to fitting ourselves around everything else.

Work.
Family.
Appointments.
Jobs that need doing.
Other people’s needs.

And when you’ve spent years being the person who gets things done and is there for everyone else, it’s surprisingly easy to lose touch with a very simple question:

What do I actually want?

Not what would be sensible.

Not what I should do.

What do I want?

It doesn’t have to be anything big.

A walk because the sun’s out.
Coffee with a friend.
An afternoon doing absolutely nothing useful.
Saying yes because it sounds fun.
Or saying no, simply because you don’t want to.

And if you can’t immediately think of the last thing you did simply because you wanted to…

Perhaps that’s worth noticing.

Vanessa x

PS This was taken on a boiling hot day, it was soooo cool in that tunnel !!

I care deeply about the impact coaching can have on people.

Not in a dramatic, overnight life changing kind of way
although sometimes things can shift quite quickly.

More often, it’s in the quieter changes that happen over time.

Where someone starts to feel a bit more confident in themselves
at home, at work, in how they show up.

I see it in the people I work with, and I’ve experienced it myself too.

Because I’m not on a pedestal here.

Life has thrown its fair share of challenges my way as well.

And one of the biggest things coaching has given me is a better understanding of myself, and other people.

Things that might have frustrated me before don’t tend to sit with me in the same way now.

That feeling still shows up occasionally, but it passes much more quickly.

There’s more awareness.
More perspective.
More choice in how I respond.

And that’s what I find so powerful about coaching.

It’s not about fixing people.

It’s about helping them understand themselves more deeply, so they can live and work in a way that feels more aligned and more confident.