Gems Guiding Light

One of the ways our body and brain react to grief is that we don’t just physically experience pain, the emotional pain we feel when we are separated from our loved through death acts as an alarm system. The anterior cingulate cortex lights up in the same way when we experience a physical pain. Emotional pain isn’t just a thought or a feeling we pass through, but it is a real reaction to grief that is felt physically by this part of the brain and in turn in our body.

So, if you’ve been told its just in your head, or you feel like your heart is actually breaking in 2 after the loss. It isn’t just an explanation; a metaphor or just something you say. Your brain sees & feels this pain as real.

This year we have had so many huge public losses that have had an impact on grief. Whether that be mourning for our idols or role models or reminding us of losses that are closer to home and are personal.

One thing that comes to my mind today is that grief is experienced by so many of us and we have had so much more discussion and awareness about grief now more than ever. Which is another reason why today matters, as today is National Grief Awareness Day 2026.

As we mourn the loss of Dolly Parton and many many others today, one thing is for sure. We are not alone when it comes to grief. Let’s keep talking about them.

As Dolly Parton said, ‘you never do replace people that you’ve lost, but you learn to live with that loss’. That is the best that we can do.

With love ❤️

There’s many things this little girl didn’t know, a lot of loss and pain. And amongst all of it, she found love and purpose ❤️

Not going to lie, feeling a bit emotional today! What a journey the last few years have been. And more importantly how has it been a year already (to the day!) since I qualified as a Holistic Grief Coach.

I have some exciting hopes ideas and aspirations coming in the future. But for now I just wanted to say thank you so much to my supporters, followers and my amazing clients so far. Your support and business over the last year has been amazing and I look forward to growing as a Holistic Grief Coach.

With love
Gem x

Let’s look at the neuroscience behind grief. The outermost layer of the human brain is our primary control centre, known as our Neocortex. We are not diving into this too heavily, but here is how we can start to understand how deeply grief affects our mind, body & spirit.

The Neocortex defines our human experience as it is the larger & more dominant part of our brain; it is our primary centre & it is literally the ‘thinking’ part of our brain. It is the centre for complex, higher cognitive functions, where we have our deeper conscious thoughts. Our neocortex is where we make decisions, it’s our thought / thinking part of our brain as well as where we find our responses, and progress our conversations. It is the area of our perception & reasoning. Our neocortex switches off & goes offline when it is activated from trauma, loss & survival. This is why it affects our thoughts, choices, responses & conversations after loss.

When we support grief somatically, we bring in regulation & integration, so that our nervous system helps to bring back the neocortex online. We activate this part of our brain. So that we are able to move forwards after loss, so we can think again, make decisions, solve problems & integrate with daily life in a world that looks completely different. Our control centre, the neocortex starts to come back.

Remembering the best Mum, Nana, and Friend we could have asked for, a little more right now as we are coming up to your 3rd Angelversary on Sunday.

Feeling like yesterday but also many lifetimes away, so much has happened and changed in that time. But blessed and humble to have had you in our lives and surrounded in the love and legacy you leave behind.

As always, in such awe of you.

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